About two and a half months ago I made a decision to give up the home where my kids have grown up. It wasn't an easy decision and I have spent many nights awake second-guessing myself. Despite the sleepless nights, it was fundamentally the right decision, although it has not been easy to settle into a completely different household routine.
Apart from moving physically, it has kicked me out of the safe, yet toxic comfort zone in which I have been existing for the past ten years. I use the word existing because that is how life has felt recently, not battling, but never truly being myself.
For the second time in my life I am looking into the abyss with no inkling of what the future might hold. Ten years ago I said goodbye to the one person who gave my life order and only then did I realise how little control we truly have. However, that being said, we do have the ability to make decisions which affect our future. That is where I stand now.
Simply Scared Shitless is how I described the feeling back then, and if I am brutally honest, I feel exactly the same. However, and this I realised probably in the last couple of days, I am excited rather than overwhelmed, nervous but not anxious. The future has not yet revealed itself, but I am no longer petrified and stuck in my comfort zone.
In my friends, I have found ample support for my plans, and I can only thank them for that, your messages are a source of strength.
The message from my children has been "Go for it, Dad, we believe in you!!" How could I ever need anything else to lift me up and keep me going.
I look once more into the abyss but for now I see opportunity, growth and the chance to truly be my own man!
Look for our more blogs and updates coming soon, and thank you Lara for the timely reminder and support.
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